just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
