thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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