he puts the penis in happiness.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
and you fell through a lawn chair
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
