Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
So squirting runs in the family.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
