you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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