dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Everything about him screamed your future.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
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