I'm going to rape someone's good day.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
