Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
