Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
