gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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