Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
