lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
