We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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