I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
handjob tips. give me some.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Panties = found
Randomize
