Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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