she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize