do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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