Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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