I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Everyone says I win the strip club
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
