Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize