i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
