Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
