she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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