Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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