Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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