North Korea, Best Korea!
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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