"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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