Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
