If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
