But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
we're blogging at a bar
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
