he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
