why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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