That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize