i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
ugly people sure do ruin things
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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