one two three fourrrrnication!
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
