i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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