I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
