hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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