I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
In America we eat man semen.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
