Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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