also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
