so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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