the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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