My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
