wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
