no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
