How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize