my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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