For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
