I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
