It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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