I'm sorry my penis didn't work
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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